Tug-AHHH-War

So life throws some pretty interesting curve balls. When you think your all alone in the would people start to come out of the woodwork. People who you never forgot and really can stop thinking about. Then on the other hand there's him, The "man" you know is a mistake, but you can't help but think if he's really telling the truth this time. Then your stuck "what do i do?" Who freaking knows! I don't know anything anymore both of these paths seem impossible. How do you just move on, and think everything's going to be perfect after a year of lieing and cheating. How do you just forget, and try to start over with somebody new hundreds of miles away? How do you do anything with a three month old and no job! Sometimes evaporation is meant for humans! I want everything to be perfect, but it's never going to be. I want him and i also want him. I've missed him but i love him! Praying helps but god never answers me. Maybe I'm just not hearing him right, or at all for that matter. I am just going to sit back and enjoy the ride! What ever happens, happens i'll be fine.